Tag Archive | help

The Bully & The Brat… And One Mama That Is Fighting Back.

As some know, my son has a lot of problems mentally and behaviorally (which stem from the mentally disabling aspects). And for YEARS he has been bullied. But only primarily by one particular boy.

Now another boy is in the mix. As is a girl as of late, and where this morning’s call to come down and intercede is rooted. Because my son completely shut down on his teacher and the student teacher (or whatever his area is).

So we got myself, the teacher, my son and the other person who was TRYING to handle things together and got the complete story. We (as in my son and I) talked about what he should have done (again), versus what he didn’t do. And what he wouldn’t let the adults do to rectify the situation.

Yes, my boy will be punished (at home) for how he mishandled all this and not cooperating with his authority figures, and for not coming to the phone to talk to me as requested, resulting in my having to go down there.

But the girl is also in trouble for starting crap and calling my kid names and making fun of him.

Hell, I’m so classy and I’m so awesome, I have the balls to not be ashamed of leaving the room and crying in front of the teacher. Again. I’m just sick of this BS. Add in embarrassment and the fact that once more, I felt like I failed him, and it’s a mess of reasons behind why I broke down.

And people are wondering WHY our youth are offing themselves?

Gee! Let’s take a look at how them bully kids are being raised in a home of intolerance and no teaching of respecting those that are different from themselves in terms of disability (of ANY nature). It’s not just the teen and pre-teen GLBT group.

Then, opportunity knocked on my imaginary door… Have (one of the few of them) bullys in room, take a chance. That’s how good I am. I don’t have to talk TO you, for you to know I am referring to you.

Let’s hope my conversation with the brat being present sinks in. It was dealing with the one boy that has picked on my son for YEARS in this school. And now, they are BOTH going to the same Middle School next year.

I even made certain the little demon heard about MY OWN problems with being made fun of as a kid.

I KNOW he listened because if I turned to glance at him, he turned his eyes from me like he wasn’t paying attention. And he now knows I will NOT tolerate it, am utterly sick of it, and this is DAMAGING my child.

Believe me, bullying today is on an entirely different level than it was in my days as a kid with physical differences. I would NOT want to be a kid in today’s society.

Retard!… That’s So Retarded. *Let’s Change.*

“That’s so RETARDED!”

“I feel retarded for saying/doing that.”

“What a retard!”

Have you ever heard someone, or heard yourself say any of the above statements?

How about, “I’m sorry, but your child is retarded.”

When you say things like “I’m/that is so retarded” or “what a retarded thing to say/do”, you are not just cutting down those that have said or done something out of the so-called “norm”. You are hurting those with in the Disability Community. Especially those that have cognitive/mental delays and/or brain injuries. You are implying that they are stupid. Even without aiming the R-word directly at them.

Yes, there is a medical definition of “mental retardation” and “mentally retarded”. But now, as a move and as a means to help end the use of the R-word, medical professionals have become known to now use the terms “mentally delayed”, “mentally handicapped”, “mentally disabled” or “cognitively delayed/handicapped/disabled”. Where in those latter terms do you see “retarded”? Nowhere. And that is a GREAT thing!

Take my pal, Holly over at Holly’s House; Not A Perfect Mom’s Blog and her little girl, Brooke, who has Downs Syndrome. Brooke is what you would call “Retarded”, but that word is NEVER used. She is cognitively delayed, but perfectly cute (and sly) in every way imaginable. And like Holly, I deplore the R-word. And I think it shows one’s ignorance when a person uses the term in a way of means to cut themselves or someone else down. Intentionally or not!

When I was little, I required a trache to assist me with my breathing due to other health issues with my lungs and airway. I had that thing in my throat a good chunk.. no my entire childhood. Had it removed 17 days before my 13th birthday. For years I was ridiculed, called names, mocked and made the butt of my peers’ jokes. And…

I was labeled “Retarded” by children and adults alike. Especially the adults that knew NOTHING of me, except my appearance out in public.

For years, I had to fight that R-word label. Seeing as I was NOT cognitively/mentally disabled. And even if I was, would that really and honestly be a “good” name to label me with? I didn’t think so either.

Please spare me the “Politically Correct” crap. I really don’t need to, or want to hear about us parents of Special Needs kids (or being a currently or formerly disabled person ourselves, possibly) getting all so-called ‘uppity’ over a “word”.

Maybe if you had to wear the label for a day, or even a week, and see how it feels, then rest assured, you would change your mind in a hot second, my friend!

So, join me and take the pledge to “Spread the word to end the Word”.

Go to R-Word; Spread the word to end the Word and tell everyone that you want to help us collectively say “this is wrong and it needs to stop!” today. I did.